As many of you know, over the holidays I got very sick. I missed about 2 months worth of work, which made paying for school extremely difficult. I know the Lord has provided every moment, yet I consistently find myself doubting.
Wednesday morning, the 21st of January I began to panic about money yet again. “Was LU really
God’s will for my life? Did I make the wrong decision? Am I walking in
communion with the Lord—or am I trying to make my desires fit into God’s
picture of my life?”
My monthly payment comes out every 25th of the month and I
just was not going to be able to make this one. I went to
breakfast with a friend and I remember telling her that I just felt
overwhelmed. She encouraged me and I continued on my way. I worked until
5ish and then went to dinner before attending Campus Community, a Bible Study for us kids on campus. I do what's called "CSER" there (required Christian Service Hours). I generally love it, but this Wednesday I just wanted desperately to go home and rest.
But I went begrudgingly at the coaxing of a friend. Work had me exhausted, I felt overwhelmed, and I was dirty and gross
from working all day, I hadn't had the chance to change out of my work clothes.
We
did our CSER by greeting at the doors, and then sat down for the
message. We are going through Galatians and talked about how the gospel is based off of grace, not works. Jesus pays our debt. We can rest in his provision.
Somehow out of this, our Campus Pastor declared "is anyone here seriously worried about debt?" and I immediately started to cry. He asked if any of us would like prayer to go ahead and come down the isle. Yet again, my friend encouraged me to go. So I did. At this point, I'm a hot mess. I begin to pray along side of a couple of other kids. The pastor goes "alright, you guys are all dismissed, but if anyone would like to come up here and pray for these kids or give them something, and just be the church to them, please feel free."
The Campus Community showed me what Christ’s body is supposed to look
like. I was encouraged with sweet words and prayed over. Kids just kept pouring forward and handing me cash!
I was handed
cash by students I didn’t even know! I know that students here are broke
too, ramen noodles and Dollar Tree toilet paper are all of us kids best
friends. What I witnessed Wednesday night reminded me of the passage
that Paul wrote about in 2 Corinthians 8:2 “In the midst of a very
severe trial, their overflowing joy and their extreme poverty welled up
in rich generosity.”
I went home extremely floored by the grace of God and his rich
generosity by his children to his children. My pockets were filled with
dollar bills. I got home and wept with joy as I began to count it. My
brothers and sisters in Christ ended up giving me $342---Which was
precisely what I needed to make my payment on Sunday! The Lord paid my
bill, yet again. He used his children to prove to a doubting Thomas that
he is faithful-always.
I want to say thank you to the kids who gave me money, prayed for me, and
spoke words of encouragement to me. I have no idea who you are, but the
Lord used you to speak to me in a very tangible way.
Please remember that the Lord is good in the great times and bad. The Lord sees, hears,
and cares for our every need. He provided what I needed exactly 4 days
before the payment was due. God is never late; he is always right on
time. We can rest peacefully in his provisional arms.
