My Paragraphs for Writing Class xD

One day in writing class I was asked to write a story. It was so that I could learn how to use paragraphs. However, I felt I already partially understood the art. Nevertheless, "Practice makes perfect." my teacher exclaimed.


So I sat down and began to write a story. It told of a young girl who was trapped in the heart of a deep forest. She was trapped, and helpless, the typical young maiden in popular novels. However, as I was writing I became distressed with the typical maiden, and began throughout the story, to warp her into a hideous creature.

As in most stories, the young maiden needed saving. So, I wrote into the plot, a handsome young man to rescue her. He rode in on a noble white steed--- I stopped, my pen hovering over the page. This was too typical. I took my pen and aggressively attacked the page, ripping a hole into the paper's precious flesh. I winced, that was not my intention. The poor paper lay there, seriously injured. My pen was bleeding from the brutal attack, it had won, but had definitely been wounded.

Looking frantically around the room for something to repair the damage, my eyes fell upon scotch tape. Grabbing it, I rushed over to the wounded paper and began to attend to it's wounds. I winced, the tape had solved the immediate problem, but the poor paper would be scarred forever.

Sighing I picked up my pen again, realizing it had died while I was attending to the paper. 'Serves it right.' I muttered under my breath. I glanced around the room casually, when suddenly I realized something; I should have used a pencil.

I grabbed a pencil, and began to write again. Instead of writing the original story I had planned on, I wrote of my calamity and sent it in. Hoping I would get a good grade....

I Desire.....

"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4 (NIV)

(WARNING ANOTHER JOURNAL ENTRY!!!)

If I delight myself in You... won't you be all I want?

James 4:1-3 (ESV)

What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this that your passions (pleasures) are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not recieve, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions (pleasures).

>_<

Ok, I don't think I've ever asked... because I'm afraid of vers 3... so I've "schemed" "fought and quarreled" I'm so wrong. Forgive me. Create in me a clean heart oh God, restore in me the joy of your salvation. Make You my passions, make You my desire.

... now I ask :p

But from a clean heart. You know I desire a relationship. Would you, prepare a pure, godly man, with his heart in tune with you--- for me? And allow me the patience, and contentment to wait on You?

If you intend for me to stay single, prepare my heart.

Whatever You have planned, please work in my foolish heart. It wants to run and fufill it's passions. You become it's passion. You fill me. You become my desire. And I leave the other passions behind. I'll leave the one's that are "proper" but need waiting and molding Your hands And I'll focus on loving you, Not serving you, not pleasing you.... I can only do those things through Christ, whom I claim is my friend, and whom I love dearly. I need to start acting like it.

Oops...

There are no "deals" with God... I think that's another thing I've figured out I struggle with.

"I've been a good girl, therefore God must.... (fill in the blank)"

"If I'm a good little girl, then God will bless me, hopefully in the way I want."

... which really isn't being a good little girl at all, is it? ...oops.

Let's see... that covers:

envy ( I want this God...)

manipulation (If I do this God has to do this...)

deceit (I'll be a good girl, but only if I get what I want...)

is jealousy the same thing as envy? maybe it is... but we'll put it on the list anyways.

discontentment (why didn't God do what I thought he would?!)

anger (Okay God, what do I have to do to get you to understand, THIS is what I want... not THAT!!)

And the whole time God's going... "Hun... I never agreed to that...."

Sounds like a good little Christian girl no?

I have a lot to work on......

Why Facebook is a "NO" This Week

So whoever is reading this probably came to read on why I'm not going on Facebook this week... I'm going to include bits and pieces of my journal, that is part of the reason I came to the conclusion I should stop Facebook for a week. As a warning, my journal entries fluctuate between prayers and statements of what occurred in my week... so if it seems that the post is directed toward you, it's not... it's really a letter to God :)

So first of all... I want you to keep working in my life.

I need to trust you.

I need to stop making crude jokes.

I need to stop thinking I need so much :P

I am very "lonely" (guywise) which is retarded because I am very blessed with great friends, but I know that there is not a guy for me here. Yet. I think I get impatient with that.

....

I'm seriously considering staying off of Facebook for a week and regaining my strength. Because I think I'm recognizing issues, but not taking the time to deal with them. I'm reading the word every day, but I'm not meditating. It's like I've been eating fast-food all month spiritually.. and if I don't watch it I'm going to get sick. Sheesh... I am getting sick spiritually... and it's making me sad.

I know it must make you sad. You're the water of life, and I'm content to get my feet wet while I'm telling others to "Jump in!! The waters fine!!" Because I've been in the deep end, and know the water is AWESOME!

Yeah...

Sadness and Rhyme,

These are the times

These are the momories

We find a way

Pushing through the day

So speak to me gently

(Did you lose yourself?

Did you leave yourself behind?)

I'm so tired of working

For so long

To be loved

So Jesus stay by my heart

Stay beside me

You are hope for my soul

You complete me

You make us one

You make us one

So like a child I'm gazing

Into perfect grace

So hold me close to you, Never let me go

You're all I want You're all I ever needed

You're all I want, Help me know you are near

Father use my ransomed life

In any way you choose

And let my song forever be, my only boast is You.

(Future of Forestry -Speak to Me Gently, Did You Lose Yourself, Working to Be Loved, Stay Beside Me, Gazing, and some church songs :) )

The Reason for God

For school this week I had to write a book report based on Timothy Keller's "The Reason for God" my teacher requested I post it on my blog, so here it goes, enjoy!

Timothy Keller wrote with a specific purpose. In his book The Reason for God, he challenges commonly accepted theories and tests them against historical facts and common sense. He presents the Christian faith, and provides the reasoning behind the belief. He boldly states that the Christian faith is not blind, and that there are many “clues” (he refuses to call them “proofs”, because you cannot “prove” history.) to the belief in God, and the claim of the resurrection.

One of society’s biggest cries today, is that “truth is relative”. Keller considers its implications to its fullest extent. One of his biggest arguments is, “If truth is relative, then how can you tell me I’m wrong?” Indeed, if truth is relative, who are you to tell me I’m wrong? It’s only your opinion. In all manner of speaking, the people who say, “Truth is relative” are really saying, “All truth is relative, except mine”. Because if truth was truly no pun intended) relative, then you couldn’t say it was, because that would be an absolute truth.

Keller also states that every man has a concept of God on some level, even atheists. It’s a big thing to assume, but it is completely consistent in what he claims to believe. In Romans 1:20 it says, “For ever since the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky. Through everything God made, they can clearly see his invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature. So they have no excuse for not knowing God.” (NLT)

One of the biggest complaints of “non-believing” people is that Christians are not consistent. They claim one thing, and then act as if what they just claimed was not true. Keller should be applauded for his consistency.

His reasons for this outrageous statement are moral obligation, and the problem of human rights. The same people who will say that there is no God, will advocate abortion, yet demand the equality of women in the workplace, and then blatantly state that truth is relative. Keller points out these major inconsistencies and begs of us to examine what we really believe. We say that murder is wrong and that people have “God-given rights” and then claim there is no God. Clearly, all of us are lying to ourselves somehow; we need to solve the problem of our inconsistencies.

He then states that our concept of God is skewed. (This is also consistent with his beliefs.

The Lord looks down from heaven, on the entire human race; he looks to see if anyone is truly wise, if anyone seeks God. But no, all have turned away. (Psalm 14:2 &3a NLT)) There are two loudly stated beliefs about God:

1.) God is a God of love

2.) God is cruel and demanding, demanding blood for the penance of sin.

Keller states that God is a God of love, but not in the sense we understand. We are not able to manipulate God into accepting who we are without change by simply stating, “God is a God of love.”

God is not a child abuser. The real story of the cross is described in Chapter 12. People want God to “just forgive” us, instead of demanding a price for the sin we’ve committed. Keller helps us see the impossibility of this by describing the fact that, even when someone forgives us of something, someone always has to pay. When someone damages your property, if you just forgive them, that’s great for them. Someone has to pay for the damage, if you forgive them, you are the one paying for the damage of the property. Keller points out that Christians believe that Jesus is God. So, on the cross, God ‘paid’ for the damage we did to his ‘property’ (us, creation, and the other people our sin affects.) I know for me, that was personally convicting. Sometimes I forget just how much God did for me. Keller doesn’t allow us to nonchalantly approach the cross.

Nobody debates the fact that Jesus was crucified. The debate comes in when you state one word; Resurrection.

You cannot prove a resurrection, Keller knows this. Therefore, instead of trying to prove something he can’t, he points out the “hints” that lead up to a strong case for the reality of the resurrection, for example, the witness of the women, the witness of over five-hundred other people, the martyr’s, and the empty tomb. He states; ‘if the disciples had really made all of this up, then why would they have used women as the first witnesses, when they knew that even in court a woman’s testimony held no weight?’

After creating such a strong argument for the existence of God, Keller states that with this knowledge we cannot just simply walk away. Evidence like this demands a verdict, and Keller will not allow us to leave the courtroom without serious consideration to what we will do with the evidence presented.

If God exists, then you are either his enemy, or on his side.

Keller gives the outline for salvation, and states that we need to throw aside our doubts. If we are only holding back because we know how much control God really has over our lives (and hate that fact) then we need to ask for forgiveness, and ask God to change us. We need to allow His hand in our lives, and only then will we find our ‘true reality’. God created us, he already controls us. The question is, will you fight that, or simply accept it?

In conclusion, The Reason for God is an excellent book and should be considered as a supplement to any apologetics course, or read by skeptics of God everywhere.

How Do We Love God?

Yesterday Wednesday night Bible Studies started up again. I think those are my favorite. It's awesome when your week goes really terrible, and then you get to come on Wednesday night and be reminded of God.

Yeah, sometimes we just need to be reminded that he exists. Or at least, I know I do.

My day yesterday didn't go so amazing. I had a really really hard time. I was doing pretty good, till around 2:30ish. We were just about to leave, and I had plugged in my ipod (so it could charge) because I wanted to show a friend a CD of Future of Forestry. Well, I had stuck my ipod into my sisters computer, instead of the one that has my Itunes on it. Aaaannnd my ipod fizzled and froze. That didn't make me happy. So grumbling I went out to the car and sat while I waited for us to leave.

Well my siblings and I help out for Wednesday Night Dinners, roughly about 500 people come each night to the supper. (Sometimes more.) We're in charge of setting out plates, wrapping silverware (all 500... ick), placemats, salt &pepper etc.

When we finally finished, it was almost time for dinner...but I had an algebra test. And boy was I stuck.

But then it finally came... my favorite part. Bible Study!!!

We talked about love. The greatest commandment is to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind. That's really hard to do. How do we put God first??

By realizing who he is.

Wassup? Actually.. Quite a Bit!!

Hey look! I'm actually blogging!!! (And ignoring proper punctuation!)

I have time today, and it feels great. I don't really have any deep thoughts right now. I think that's because at the moment I'm still kinda in shock. Our church is going through a "storm" right now. And adjusting to change is not one of my strong points.

I've also been super-busy taking care of friends, and exhausting myself while serving them. I lovvvee doing that!! I think I'm starting to burn myself out though. It's not good to serve constantly and never draw on God's strength. I'm starting to learn that.

My week is filled up already, and it's only Monday. I'm so enjoying relaxing right now. I really need to move a bed into my room... See, when we moved in both my sister and I took futon's in our room, it makes more space. And seeing as how we're in the same room... we thought the best thing would be the space, instead of a real bed.

Except I have bad knees. The futon only aggravates that. Then I try to compensate for the ache, and end up killing my back. -sigh- So I end up waking up in the middle of the night all tired, and sore. Then I have a hard time falling back to sleep.

Apparently I'm sleeping some, but only enough to produce strange dreams, and I'm talking in my sleep, again. I haven't done that in forever. Oh, and last week my side began to ache again.

Which is really bad.

Long story short?

For some reason God created it so that my side hurts when I over-do it. We thought it was mono at first, (last year when it started doing that) but then the doctors took x-rays, and tested me for mono and everything, and they couldn't figure out why my side does that.

Guess I'm just messed up....

On the bright side of things, my mom ordered my contacts!!! :) YAY! I hate wearing my glasses, they're this hideous white color, and they're kinda cat-eye-ish... yeeeah, just doesn't fit my face.

Oh! And I just got signed up for driving school :)

I'm not sure whether to be happy... or terrified...

hehe.

I think I finally figured out why God didn't let me get a job this summer, and even cut-out Wake Tech. God's so much smarter than me. I hate it that it takes tons of things to remember that. But, I think God's using me to help out my friends through their crisis' this semester. It's pretty cool that God's letting me do that. A few years ago, the only friends I had only tolerated me. Because, I was pretty selfish... and really obnoxious too. Now, not only am I more than tolerated, people seek me out! I can't walk through the halls of my church without having to stop, give hugs, highfives, fist-punches, and seek out how people are doing!

It's a pretty cool thing, to see how God works in messed up people's lives. Not only do I get to see him work through mine, but now I'm watching him work through my friends lives!!

I think I'll leave with this quote I picked up from a conference I got to go to this weekend called "Next Level". The speaker ended up being my mom's college professor. He was awesome. He made the Old Testament make sense to me. It was awesome. Anyways, here's the quote:

"I am not what I ought to be

I am not what I want to be

I am not what I hope to be

But still, I am not what I used to be,

And by the grace of God,

I am what I am." -John Newton

And Then There Was None

Well, I haven't blogged in forever... which I'll probably blog about, in the time when I finally find time to blog about not having time, and how we need to make time for God. But tonight is not that night.

So, instead I will put down the few words that my friend and I have decided to put in the dictionary. Seeing as how people probably will not commonly use these words, we decided to make our own. We only have four words so far, but it's gradually building. We've talked about doing this for a while... but I only JUST now started it.

Here are the words:

Confabulated - (Past tense verb form of “Confabulate”) Adj,: to be fabulously confused by an outside source. Confabulation- Noun

Home-mashed - Verb: The art of mashing potatoes in the home.

Noun: Referring to real mashed potatoes, not the nasty box stuff.

Nothingnesses- Noun: The people of Nothingness.

Wowt- Expression: It's like "Wow", but with the awesomeness of Mr. T (Ex. Wowt! This stuff is amazing!!)

_____________________________________________________

And those are our words :)

My week's been crazzyy. But I'm learning to rest in God. :)