Endurance

So, I just recently learned I'm going to have to go back to Physical Therapy for a condition in my knee. That statement is kinda vague so let me explain.

As a kid I had trouble with my knees, but my mom always thought they were growing pains, when I got to be about 13 my mom took me to the doctors to have them check my knee out, to make sure nothing was really seriously wrong. I was told that I needed to see an orthopedist, so my family physician sent me off with a referral to a doctor close to where I lived. He took a look at my knee, and I explained the pain I was experiencing, I was told I had torn my ACL.

Before receiving an MRI I was sent to get an ACL brace. Thinking that this brace would help, I grew very excited at the thought of not having to experience as much pain as I had previously been in, I was very restless waiting for the custom-made brace to come in. When it did, I was thrilled.
Till six months later.
Six months passed, and in between that time I received many more X-rays, and an MRI.
When the MRI was turned in the doctor told me I would need surgery, he didn't allow us to see the MRI results, or explain them much at all... he just sent in a nurse to say that I would be needing surgery.

My mom did not like that. He needed to explain what was going on, so we headed back to my family physician for a referral to a different orthopedist.
With a second opinion, we found out what was going on.
I hadn't torn my ACL. I had a knee disability where the muscle that is supposed to hold my kneecap into place was not doing it's job, causing the bone that holds the knee on-track to be ground down by the friction of my knee-cap sliding, causing one bone to be higher than the other.
In OTHER words. I just needed a brace and some Physical Therapy to be back up to par.
Occasionally surgery will be an option with this condition IF the PT and brace does not alleviate pain, but I would be worse off because I have extensive scar tissue build-up. So it would only make things worse.

That's what the other doctor hadn't told us.
After six months I remember it being near Christmas time and having one wish; to be out of the stupid ACL brace. And God allowed me to get out of it, and I walked away from that second Dr.'s appointment with Physical Therapy exercises I could do at home.

Well I'm fifteen now, and I constantly forget there are certain things I'm not supposed to do. Pivoting, and running upstairs being some of them.

Wednesday I did a 360 without picking up my foot. Bad girl. Again again again. Went to the family physician for referrals, then to the orthopedist for a referral to Physical Therapy.

To say the least, I'm frustrated.

But I keep reminding myself;

"These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls."

(1 Peter 1:7-9)
and

"For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ."

2 Peter 1:5-8
Keep Sinking Up!!

Stellar Kart :)

Love is a Verb??

Okay, this has to be one of THE coolest songs in the world...
http://popup.lala.com/popup/576742231834150717
It's called "Love is a Verb" by dcTalk a band that used to be around but split up a while ago.
Here's some info on them:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DC_Talk
Enjoy the song!!

Sur-ren-der!

This is a page or two out of one of my favorite books "The Trouble with Tulip" It's by Mindy Starns Clark and is A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!!!
The message in it is amazing, and I just felt like posting part of it;
(The context is that Danny (a struggling photographer and the drummer of "Regeneration", a band his family put together) has just finished a show at a church, and made only $43 in Love Offering money. He also has realized that he really loves Jo Tulip, his childhood best friend, but she doesn't love him back in the same way...)

Aggravated, Danny told his family goodbye and climbed into his car. Before he could pull out of his parking space, however, the passenger door opened and his mother plopped down into the seat next to him.
"Wait a minute, Danny," She said. "I need to talk to you."
"What is it, Ma? I have to get to work."
"What's going on?" She asked. "You seem upset"
He put the car in park, hesitated, and turned off the key. It was a cloudy day, dark and oppressive, and he wondered if his life would always be like this --- lots of hard work for very little money and some big dreams that were never going to come true.
"How do you do it, Ma?" he asked her. "How do you collect the penny-ante love offerings when you know what our shows are really worth? How do you keep plugging away with the band when you know that your goals and dreams are never going to come true?"
That was probably more than she had expected to hear, Danny realized. But he was tired and frustrated, from the situation with Jo to his career as a photographer. Soon, something somewhere was going to have to give.
"You're right," his mother said softly. "I did have big dreams when I was younger. I just had to rethink things, is all."
"Rethink things? How do you reconcile your desire to be a big music star with the knowledge that you just made forty-three dollars from a morning's worth of talent and hard work? It's crazy."
"Yeah, it is." she admitted. "I guess I just tell myself that the Lord knows what He's doing. Maybe you need to surrender."
"But how?" Danny demanded. "How do you surrender something you want with every fiber of your being? How do you give something over to God's control when you still have to spend every waking moment trying to make it happen for yourself?"
She exhaled slowly, reached out, and patted his hand.
"Ah, Danny," She said. "it's so hard to explain. Part of the peace I have comes from knowing that God is using me, no matter how limited the fashion. Given the choice, I would rather have performed this morning for an audience of thousands. But today God put me up in front of about sixty women, and so that's what I did instead. Hopefully, a song we sang or a story we shared touched someone in there in ways we cant ever understand. Don't you see? That's much bigger than anything I might have planned because that's letting God use me for His purposes."
Danny closed his eyes, wondering if he could ever be as surrendered as she was.
"But why would God give met he desire to be a professional photographer if He wasn't going to let that dream come true?" He asked softly.
"You are a professional photographer, Danny."
He shook his head.
"You know what I mean. I want the big leagues, Ma, the Scene Its and the National Geographics and the recognition and the respect. Do you know how hard it is to snap pictures of drooling babies all day and pretend I'm making some kind of art?"
"You're touching people's lives honey. Can't that be enough?"
Touching people's lives. Danny thought of the kid in the wheelchair and how he had stood up to the boy's mother. Maybe in some small way, he was doing some good in the world. But what about doing good for himself, for his career?
"As a man I can't let this go." he said slowly. "My dreams are juts to big. Too important to me."
He expected her to sympathize. Instead she simply pursed her lips and then opened the door.
"You need to surrender your ambitions," she said. "And while you're at it, you need to surrender your relationsip with Jo as well."
He looked at her, surprised that she knew.
"What?" she asked. "You didn't think your sisters would tell me? Like they had to? I've known for a long time."
He had to laugh, hating that the women in his life seemed to know him better than he knew himself.
"What if I tell her I love her and she says she doesn't love me back?" he whispered.
"Sur-ren-der, Danny," his mother replied slowly. "God will work it out." Then she climbed out of the car and got into her own and drove away, leaving him there in the parking lot alone.

(The Trouble with Tulip pp. 257-259)

Beaker. The Best Muppet EVER.

One is NEVER to Old for the Muppets!!.

An Epic Story.

I would like to engage your mind in a story of epic proportions, one that will be told for many years and will go down in history.
*clears throat*
We begin this tale with a hungry girl, a loving sister, and a burrito. This hungry girl asked for her loving sister to embark on a new adventure, to COOK this said burrito, and to give it to the starving child.The loving sister agreed. And began to cook the burrito. She put in chicken, beans, sour cream and a variety of ingredients. She poured oil into a pan and placed the delightful burrito in the pan and promptly lit it on fire. The starving child laughs at the loving sister's attempt at cooking and screams " I LOVE YOU" at the top of her lungs as smoke filled the room.The loving sister glared at the starving child, turns off the fire, and promptly beats the burrito until it is no longer aflame.Turning to look at her sister through the hazy smoke she proclaims: "I just want you to know, in China, that's considered COOL."

And that is the end of my tale... and my lunch too!! (Based on a true story.)

Jars of Clay - Work -

Don't be afraid of things to come. Remember;
"Be strong and courageous, do not be terrified do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." -Joshua 1:9

On Hold by God.

Sometimes God leaves life on pause, and that really, really stinks.

We are not very patient people most of the time. Especially now-a-days, when you can just stick things in the microwave and have a whole meal in less than 30 minutes. Think about it, we are so fast paced now, that when our computer takes more than 5 minutes to load a large file, we get overly frustrated!!!!

So, when God puts our life on 'pause' or 'hold', we get irritated, edgy, and quite worried.
'What if what he has planned hurts me?'
'What if it's not what I want?'
'What if what I want to happen... never will?'

Our minds race and we get so concerned, sometimes it keeps us awake at night...
But I think, when God puts our life on 'hold' we need to go back to His word and remember what he told us in Luke:

"Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well."

Do not worry about what the Lord is doing, he knows the plans he has for you. He has a plan, and knows what the end result will be.
It may hurt, but trust in the fact that He will take care of you. No matter how much it hurts.
I'm going to repost a song that I posted before, because it's so relevant to what I'm trying to say here.

It's called "Let It All Out" by Relient K.

Trust in the Lord He knows what he's doing! Keep Sinking Up!

In Honor of Valentine's Day

So, today's the day!! Some people love this day, others dread it. It never really bothered me. I'm single, and until God wants that to change, I'm chill with it. God'll bring the right guy along when it's time.

But even if you are single like me, we still (as Christians) have a responsibility to love one another. "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:34-35)

Even if it's not a special person of the opposite sex, we need to be Christ's love to everyone. How has God loved us?
"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

Let's be love to one another today! And not just today, but every day... remember:
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Forward Motion!

Whatever My Hands Find To Do.....

Yesterday morning I got up and began once again packing for the move to the new house that my dad is finishing up. (Only three weeks to wait now!).
I don't know if you have ever moved before, but packing can be a blessing and a curse.
It can be enjoyable to purge the stuff you don't need, but after a while you NEVER want to see a cardboard box, or sharpies, or tape.... EVER AGAIN.
As I was packing, I was really tired of boxes. And having to watch my stuff disappear into the boxes that I wouldn't be allowed to open for three weeks. I was sick of doing it, just flat-out TIRED.
In the middle of thinking how exhausted I was, as I was throwing different items into a box (Sort of sorted, but only half the effort I was capable of)I found a little laminated card with a verse on it, the card was my favorite color (yellow) so I stopped to look at it. This is what it said:

"Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of your inheritance." Colossians 3:23-24

............
Don't you love it when God does random things like that?
So yeah, when you get tired of working at something, because your just not 'feeling' it... remember you aren't doing it for the reward..."Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might.." (Ecc 9:10) Your doing it because it's a way to honor God.

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God" 1 Cor 10:31
Yuppers! Keep Sinking Up!

Mad Guitar Skillz

Mac Giver, Magnum PI, and Hulk --- very cool medley.

The Adventures of Gunner

(By Request from Matt Berg)

Gunner was a small man, Not more than four feet tall. (Well, to be precise, 3' 4-3/4", but he prefers to just say "four foot".) His hair was brown, with a slight wave to it. His eyes were a sparkling green, the same shade as his mother, Celeste.

Now Celeste was a patient woman, she had learned patience from her husband Matticus. Matticus and Celeste had fallen in love many years ago, it was love at first sight.
Matticus met her, and instantly knew he must date her. Once he began dating her, it was imprinted in his mind that he MUST marry her. So he did. This all occurred in the time frame of 1 minute.

Now we are looking back, onto that lovely day. For it is Matticus and Celeste's 30th wedding anniversary. 'But,' you ask.. 'I thought this was about Gunner!'. Ahh... patience my friend. Learn from wise old Matticus, a lesson in patience will serve you well.

Gunner knew that on this fateful day he must present his parents with a lovely gift. For, after all... it was them who brought him into this world (and had threatened many a time to take him out.)and he knew he owed them greatly. Gunner had not seen his parents in years. He had gotten busy, and letters were inconvenient. Whatever his excuse, he found it a good one. But alas, he knew that he had no excuse for missing an anniversary.

So he devised a plan. After not seeing his mother and father for years, he would visit them. So, he packed for the long journey.
First, he knew he'd need his map. Gunner had a tendency to get lost, especially on long trips. He looked at his old map, and then rethunk this through. He had just recently gotten a gift card to Worst Buys, and thought to himself 'Self? Go get yourself a GPS.' So he did. Once back from the store, he returned to his pack and began to fill it with clothing. Enough to last him for the journey.

'Almost finished' he thought, and looked around his room. Suddenly, he spotted his Ipod, and lifted it off the shelf. 'This is very important,' He spoke aloud, and to himself. 'I'm going to need this for the long journey there and back' so he checked to make sure it was charged. It was empty.

So again, he waited for his Ipod to charge, wasting a few hours of precious time.
How would he make it to his parent's on time at this rate?
So he hurriedly zipped up his pack and hurried out the door.
Forgetting to lock the door, and to clean out the fridge. Gunner sighed and lowered his pack, and walked back into his house. After a good hour of cleaning, and fifteen minutes of checking to make sure all the doors and windows were locked, he breathed a sigh of relief, picked up his bag, and crossed the street to his parents house.
The End.

Trust You?

(For your convenience, the places where God speaks are in bold so that it doesn't get overly confusing!)

(We enter, the sun has just risen, and the eyes of a very sleepy human has just opened...)

"Good morning God!"
"Good morning, isn't it a beautiful day?"
"Yes! Thanks for another day! (yawns and sits up, then looks at God) So what are we doing today?"
"Well, you asked me this year to change you, and so far it's been going really good!! I've torn down some of the walls that have been crumbling and built up some new ones. But today, let me show you what I have planned."
(God takes the human by the hand and they enter a construction site, this is the human's "heart" the human has asked God to do some additions, and make some changes with the crumbling foundation, and most of the 'heart' looks really well, but God takes the human by the hand and walks behind all the new walls that he has built and walks to the back of the heart. In the corner hidden by some shadows is a very old wall. This is where God takes the human and then walks towards the old, decrepit wall.)
(The human suddenly wiggles his hand out of God's and starts to back away. Fearful of what God might say.)
"Ummm, you know, God... I was kinda hoping we could do something else today..."
(God gently slides his hand back into the timid human’s. God then takes both of there hands and feels the wall.. it is crumbling, dusty and decayed.)
"This needs to be taken care of, my child."
"Yeah... I know. But maybe later... What about that wall over there??" (The human then points to another wall that is still in construction, it's smaller than the rest, but is progressing nicely)
(God smiles kindly) "That one I'm still working on. But this has to be taken care of. If you don't let me take care of this, it will destroy everything else that I've already done."
"But, but... this one is kinda hard to let go of, it took me forever to build."
"My child, did you not ask me to change you this year?"
"Yes, but I was kinda hoping that we could do this one later..."
"Do you want me to change you?"
(Stands, eyes flooded with fear, but then decides that this is really what he wants) "Yes Lord. I want you to change me." (glances at the old wall) "I.... I just, I CAN'T let you tear that one down!" (Tears begin to flood the human's eyes and he leans against the old wall and sits down.)
(God then kneels down and wipes the tears from his child's eyes. He then tilts the human’s chin towards his, and looks the scared creature in the eye. Care etched into every line on his face) "Do you trust me, my child?"
(The human gazes into God's caring eyes and then nods his head slowly.)
"I know this is hard for you, but you asked me to change you... is that what you really want?"
(the human nods his head vigorously.)
"Then if you trust me, and this is really what you want... then you MUST let me tear this wall down."
(The human nods his head. But then worry creases on his/her brow) "But that, that wall....(touches the decaying wall) This wall... will hurt!! Especially if you tear it down!! I won't have anything left!"
(God takes the human's hand off of the wall, and holds it in his.) "You mean, you won't have anything left to protect you?"
(The human nods his head, then hangs it in shame.)
"My child, I can protect you..."
"But this wall was doing fine..."
"But look..." (Takes the human's hand and runs it across the foundation of the wall.) The foundation is cracked, and it doesn't let any light into the things behind it."
"But that leads to the center of my heart!!”
"I know..."
(the human has a look of fear flash over his eyes, and looks around wildly)
"Do you trust me?"
(the human looks at the wall, then at God...)

"Okay. You can tear it down...."
(God nods his head slowly.)
(The lights fade and that's where we leave the scene...)

My Personal Testimony

So for the Choir I'm in at my church, I was asked to write my testimony out.
This is a rough draft but I felt like sharing it, especially since life has been so hectic and I haven't been able to write.
But the good news is that we have about only 3 weeks until we move, which makes me very, very happy.
So anyways, here's my rough draft:
When I was about 4 years old, I asked Jesus to save me. We had just come home from Sunday School, and I knew I needed to be His child. I don't think when I first prayed I fully understood what it meant to be "saved". I had just prayed and felt better about myself.
Well, then my dad took me to go see the "Jesus" movie at our church in New York. The "Jesus" movie went through the whole gospel story of how Jesus was born of a virgin, and grew up among us as a human, fully God, and fully man. When it got to the part about Jesus dying on the cross, I burst out crying. I didn't get it, It seemed that this guy had done nothing wrong, but everyone was angry at him and went out of their way to make sure that he died. Why would they do that? Out of confusion and anxiety I just kept crying. My dad finally took me out of the church and drove me to a little cornfield near our house and sat me down.

He explained to me what it was that Jesus had done,
1. We are fallen people, we cannot do anything right. No matter how hard we try, our 'good deeds' will not get us anywhere.( Romans 6:23 “For the wages of sin is death.”) and
2. God is perfect, and cannot stand sin.
This presents a problem; Because we are fallen we cannot fix the relationship issue with God. We cannot 'make' ourselves do 'good'. We're totally depraved. "The heart is deceitful above all things,
and desperately wicked: who can know it?” also, "There is no one who understands, no one who seeks God" (Rom 3:11)
Now what?? God had to provide a way to solve the dilemma. And he did. The end of the verse I quoted before is; "BUT, the gift of God is eternal life" What is this gift? The gift is the death that I had just seen reenacted on the screen. The gift was this God-man Jesus.

See, in order to get to God, one must be perfect. But God also has to punish the sin that we commit. So God made a way to have both. Because he loves us so much.
He sent his Son; Jesus to die and take the penalty of our sins upon Himself, so that he could look upon us as righteous.

But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
and by his wounds we are healed.
(Isaiah 53:5)
“ For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him will not perish, but have eternal life” (John 3:16)
But God didn’t leave his Son dead. Three days after being crucified he rose from the dead, so that you and I could spend eternity with God.
1 Cor 5:3b-4 that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures

But it is, a gift. And you can't HAVE a gift unless you take it.
Jesus took care of the judgment, it's our job to accept the gift that He provided. Will you take it? Will Jesus Christ be enough for you?

This is what my dad explained to me in that cornfield. I finally got it.
Now I understand that the prayer that I had prayed after Sunday School was telling God that his gift was enough, and that I would take it.
“If you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. As the Scripture says, “Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame.” For there is no difference between Jew and Gentile—the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on him, for, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” (Romans 10:9-13)

Make him Lord of your life. It will change everything.